My bank offers 0.08% on their standard "Business Reserve" savings account, which is pathetic.
They offer 3% on a "Business Bond", but in order to take advantage of it I'd have to first remove my money from them into a separate Business Bank Account elsewhere for at least three months. The 3% is only on offer for "new money" you see.
Their "Business Reward Saver" gives 1.84% plus a bonus taking it to 2% provided you don't make any withdrawals for 12 months.
You'd think maybe that it'd simply be a matter of giving them a call and saying "Hi, please convert my existing Business Reserve into a Business Reward savings account"
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Nooo - it's a whole new account, which means going through the entire palaver of money laundering checks, identity and business trading address validation. More copies of driving licenses, passports, utility bills.
I'M AN EXISTING CUSTOMER FFS!
Nonetheless, I dutifully comply and send in the application form with all necessary supporting documentation.
10 days later, a letter arrives. "Could you just please sign this acknowledgement of receipt and enclose a proof of your business trading address - a bank statement or utility bill will be ideal - and return in the envelope provided"
I'M AN EXISTING CUSTOMER FFS! You have copies of my bloody business bank account statements which you send to this address already, and my signature's both on the original application *and* in your files.
It's not even a reply-paid envelope - I've got to stick a fscking stamp on it.
Fiona, in the Business Banking Call Centre, is very apologetic and appreciates that it's ludicrous and frustrating.
Good for her.